My Holiday Letter

Hello, everyone!!

Typically, I hate holiday letters. I asked our most evolved pet, Frog, to compose our family's holiday letter. He didn't think his brain was complex enough to perform such a task, nor did he give a shit. So I guess I am stuck writing the fucking letter.

My husband and I continue to live our mundane, adult lives. He continues to work at the same place. I continue to be a social worker, pretending to really want to make a difference in the world, but truly being amused by the stupidity of the human race.

Our son contunes to attend preschool. He has a very diverse class with several "brown ones", one whose "daddy was in jail". He had his first experience with organized sports this year. He played soccer this past spring. He seemed to enjoy it as much as his parents did when they were children--bored out of his mind and almost in tears on several occasions.

The beginnin of the year was also the high point! Depressionista, her husband, my husband, our friend D, and myself went on our first vacation to Amsterdam in January of 2006. We discovered our dreamland of decadance, our own little piece of heaven on Earth. Our kids stayed with grandparents, bless their soles. It was the best vacation ever and we are already trying to plan our next one.

In May, my brother got married in my home town, adding one of the few sane women to our family. She makes the holidays much more enjoyable, as she likes to drink to survive them as well. Our son was the ring bearer as well.

In June, my father came to me, and only me, to share that he had hooked up with an old high school flame over the internet for the past several months. Now he was fearful that she was going to contact the rest of his family and tell them. He was scared. As the family social worker, I think he wanted me to fix the situation. This seemed to trigger every one of my own personal issues and began my journey down Therapy Boulevard.

In July, my grandmother decided to pass on the same week that my father and mother were on vacation several hundred miles away. The the eldest grandchild, this left me as the only one to be with her as she pased on. This was actually a truly amazing experience, and one that I am glad that I got to be part of.

Also, in early July, Depressionista and I flew out to Ohio to visit Itchy Tingle for a week. It was an Awesome Girl's Week. We drove to Niagra Falls, did some gambling, saw the Falls. I got to see first hand how similiar Depressionista and Itchy Tingle's personalities are. Luckily, we all still loved eachother at the end of the trip.

After I returned from Ohio, our son had tubes put in his ears and his admoids removed. For several months previous to this, I had just assumed that he was ignoring me when I had to say his name repeatedly louder and louder to get his attention. That was a classic "shitty mom" feeling I had when he failed his hearing test due to having a lot of thick fluid in his ears.

In September, five years after being diagnosed with pancreatitus, I learned that I had gall stones. Gallstones are the #1 cause of pancreatitus. You would think some one in the medical field would have caught on to that one sooner--but perhaps my expectations are too high. I had my gall bladder removed mid-September. I got to spend a week at home on some good pain killers.

Sprinkled through out the year, were some awesome Girl's Nights between Depressionista, Pioneer Woman, Itchy Tingle, Karma Girl and my work spouse. Those nights help me survive in this crazy fucked up world. Thanks guys!

I hope everyone has a fabulous year--and if not, atleast that you can laugh at just how fucked up it all can get at times!!

Blessed be!